Thursday, April 26, 2012

Working for Good

Come out Anonymous, come out and show yourself! I got a comment on this blog from anonymous and well it has pretty much made my day. I have no idea who this anonymous person is but I must tell them thank you from the very bottom of my heart. I was at work yesterday and saw this comment with a link and I couldn't watch the link because, well, YouTube is blocked at work. I was on break, don't judge. So I put the link into Yahoo and Your Love Never Fails by Jesus Culture came up. I smiled a very large and long smile because I love this song and if I am remembering correctly, it is one that Daddy used to play and sing for Ellersley and I. I was smiling and then just thinking, 'hmm yes of course God's love never fails ever but why did they want me to hear this song?'

Like I said I have heard this song many, many times. Wesley learned to play it on his guitar so when I say many I mean like 1 billion times over and over and over. Like when they used to overplay Matchbox 20 on the radio and all you wanted to do was pull your radio straight out of your car and throw it out the window. That's how many times. So after looking it up at work I pretty much forgot about it and didn't play it when I got home.

So, this morning I was out and about driving by myself and feeling the sadness trying to creep it's way in. I pushed it back and told it to shut up and that joy was MINE today. See, we are going away this weekend. We are going to Pure Life for a conference. I told you about Pure Life, remember, here. We are going to see all of the WONDERFUL people that aided Jesus in putting our life back together after it fell to pieces. We are going to have a great time with friends and family and Jesus will be there and I mean, hey, that is just awesome! The sadness is trying to creep in because it knows that Elle was supposed to be there. Last year she was there, resting in my belly at about 14 weeks or so. We showed her off then and we were over the moon excited to bring her back this year and show her off again. There may be people there that are expecting to see her. Breaking that news is never fun.

I got my Ipod out and found this song and it started playing. I was listening for what Mr or Mrs Anonymous meant for me to hear.

You stay the same through the ages,
Your love never changes.
There may be pain in the night
but Joy comes in the morning.

Obviously a great line and so true but it wasn't striking a chord with me today. So moving along...

And when the oceans rage,
I don't have to be afraid.
Because I know that You love me,
Your love never fails

Another great line but also not hitting it. Still listening...

The wind is strong and the water's deep
But I'm not alone here in these open seas
Cause Your love never fails

The chasm is far too wide
I never thought I'd reach the other side
But Your love never fails

I was starting to get why she or he wanted me to hear it and some tears were forming. I was thanking God for the encouragement of anonymous people...just incredible. Then I heard it, the line God wanted me to hear...

You make ALL things work together for my GOOD.

I couldn't see. It was bad. I was on the highway people. And it was raining on top of the tears. Sometimes I feel like this blog is so repetitive but all I can say is I write what I feel like God wants me to say. And he really wants you guys to know that he loves you because that is all I stinkin' write about! :) So once you learn your lesson maybe he will give me something else to say, until then, sorry.

He makes all things work together for my good. I cried and I said thank you. I thanked him for sending me Ellersley and all the joy that she brought. I thanked him for loving me all the time. I thanked him for people that I don't know, that love me and pray for me on a daily basis. I thanked him for life and purpose and a journey that I never could have even DREAMT up on my own. I thanked him for friends that I see but once a year that encourage me just by their smiles and their love for our Master. I thanked him for making ALL things work together for my GOOD. ALL THINGS.

I have no idea if that anonymous person wanted me to hear that line or if he/she had an entirely different line in mind but God surely knew what I needed today. He whispered to me in the middle of a rainy morning on the highway. Whispering his love to me, yet again. Remember guys, he works all things together for your good. All things.

Thank you anonymous from the deepest parts of my soul. The parts that hold the love and the hurt for a sweet faced, tiny little girl. You were used by God today and I hope that your heart is full because of that. Thank you so much for listening to Jesus's sweet whispers and thank you so much for taking the time to reach my heart. Thank you for reading...I have NO WORDS to describe the joy that it puts in my soul to know that you know our sweet Ellersley. Isn't she just the cutest? :) I hope that someday heaven will allow me the privilege of meeting you and thanking you for filling me with joy today instead of that ugly sadness...

Elle's Mommy


brigette said...

What a beautiful sentiment! Thank you for visiting my blog. I'm sorry you know this tough road! Your angel is beautiful and I love the song you posted yesterday!! big hugs sent your way!

Tesha said...

I am so glad this blessed you, I also have experience great healing through songs. When I feel my heart growing cold I will put on certain songs and feel my wall come down. I am so glad you were blessed! Saying a prayer for you now.(Hugs)

Anonymous said...

Hey Nicki,
I'm anonymous, aka Allie (I guess I should have at least signed my name last time...I didn't mean to be completely anonymous!). I'm so glad the song blessed you! I heard it for the first time a couple months ago when I was going through a really hard time and it really spoke to me, especially "There may be pain in the night, but joy comes in the morning" and "You make all things work together for my good" (whether or not I can see it right now!). Thank you again so much for sharing Elle's story...I actually read through your entire blog from the very beginning before I posted that other comment and that was the song that I felt God bringing to mind for you. Seeing your continued faith and trust in God has really inspired me in my own Christian walk. Praying for you and thank you for blessing me!

Trennia said...

That is so very sweet of her to do that for you :)
I love music that speaks to the heart,what a beautiful song.

Sarah said...

Just stopping by for the first time. Wonderful blog-

and isn't it incredible that He does indeed know exactly what we need, and that we sometimes find angels here on earth that help Him fullfill his purposes?